Part of the problem is that compassion tends to be one of my superpowers, but I've let it slide into forgiveness too often. On the plus side-- being made aware of this and my choices, when I got an apology last night I *didn't* stand there and say 'it's ok', when it wasn't. Actually, if memory serves, I just raised my eyebrows and hmmphed. (Nothing like a 50-year-old man doing an impression of a 5-year-old doing an impression of being actually contrite. Although he got increasingly genuinely contrite as the evening wore on and forgiveness was not forthcoming. Unfortunately, while it may be possible to pick and choose one's own relatives, it's much harder to do that to one's loved ones' relatives.)