why i love cheerleaders

[keryx]

It's not just the tiny skirts!

I think pretty much every angry young girl, girl geek, or wallflower has at some point learned that cheerleaders/The Popular Girls/whatever are evil. Yes? I suspect a lot of you were like me in that respect.

Bellydancing has totally changed my mind about that. I've met a surprising number of women who were, in fact, stereotypical Popular Girls (queens of things, cheerleaders, sorority presidents, that sort of thing). I've met even more who, whatever they were in past lives, act like those girls now. They're awesome. There is certainly a level of backbiting and enforced niceness - that is, there's a way to say things, and it's not blunt [though my closer dance friends have learned to live with my blunt] - but it comes with so much enthusiasm for the beauty of your costume, and your dancing, and your smile, and... wow you are just so cool.

I think most of them mean it. I've come to find their costumes, their dancing and their smiles beautiful, too. There's a graduation process from outsider to student to performer to teacher that helps you discover and champion the beauty in other dancers. I bet that it's a lot like being in a sorority. And like, I'm totally a senior now. I look at less-experienced dancers especially, and they're just OMGSQUEEWOW so very wonderful. Okay, maybe not quite as GAH, I LOVE YOU as the ATS dancers I dance with and have trained (there's wonderful, and then there's tribe). But pretty damned wonderful.

Also? The Popular Girls? Give you presents. Best idea ever. Let's all give each other presents.

Comments

[elusis.livejournal.com]

I think this is one of the problems I have with the dance world. I do not trust the Popular Girls. They freak me out. I behave like a withdrawn freak around them. I second-guess their compliments and hugs and gifts, and they make my stomach hurt because of the second-guessing. I never feel cool enough. The last troupe I was in, one of the members was constantly agitating to go shopping together and hang out and BOND, and I was like "OMFG PLEASE NO."

I have Issues.

[box-o-spiders.livejournal.com]

That sounds so wonderful. Your posts always make me smile, but this one did especially.
There are certain convergences of women that make the atmosphere tremble with their presence and I think you've found one.

[keryx.livejournal.com]

But you are SO COOL! I am surprised that you aren't just like "hey, yes I'm cool, and I will consider your request to BOND... maybe".

I totally second-guessed it when I started, don't get me wrong. I really wasn't that cool, nor that amazing a dancer, but now I understand that all the good dancers who told me that I rocked were serious - new talent is so exciting and invigorating that as an established dancer I do in fact get all squeeish about good or dedicated noobs.

[keryx.livejournal.com]

It does seem like I spend a lot of time talking about OMG HOW AWESOME THINGS ARE. When I'm not being totally neurotic, at least.

This is a good convergence of women. I wish I could effectively articulate the transcendent feeling I get with my tribe, too.

[cutegaychick.livejournal.com]

I've been as anti-Popular Girl as anyone (although I really like sleepin with them) but I've found that as adults, the Popular Girls aren't popular because they've got trendy clothes or cute boyfriends or ... whatever made them popular in high school. They're popular now because they're genuinely nice and pleasant and supportive and other people like them. Go fig.

[goodgothgirl.livejournal.com]

Yes, that's what it's like in a sorority. :) At least a little bit. Especially the presents part.

I have the same problem with the blunt. How have you learned to overcome that? Because I lack those skills and need them pronto.

[keryx.livejournal.com]

The presents! So awesome!

I've learned to be as blunt about my love and affection as I am about your butt (yours is lovely) or your taste in shoes. Strangely, people come to like it. I figure, with a blunt person, you at least always know where you stand.

It can be... interesting... at work. This morning I told my boss it makes me unhappy when we do good cop / bad cop cause people think the guy who's always bad cop is a dick & I know he's not. Uh. In those words, actually. Thank $DEITY I work at a young, hip company and not a real serious one. I would be fired a thousand times over.

[cutegaychick.livejournal.com]

One of my favorite things about you is that when you say something nice or you seem to like someone, we all know you really mean it. Everyone always knows where they stand with you - it's refreshing. (And amusing as hell sometimes :)

[keryx.livejournal.com]

As you know, once I'm sure you like me back, I don't hesitate to tell you, often, how much I love and adore you. And it's really hard to get off the list of people I like.

I think that's a fair tradeoff for being a pain in the ass.