you're good people.
Dec. 21st, 2004 11:33 amI like you, gentle readers. I like that nearly everyone on my friends list actively questions their own thoughts and actions in terms of the culture vs. our ideals.
Today the Wilderness Office Park is much less icy, but still not safe for shoes of any heel or slippyness. So I wore my light sneakery shoes and carried in a pair of heels. I tried to wear casual shoes yesterday (it is casual dress week, after all) and felt awkward and unprofessional all day.
So today I'm wearing heels and jeans, which is about as casual as I'm okay with for work.
How did I come to think that sneakers weren't work shoes (even for jeans days)? How did I come to not feel fully dressed without my feet at an odd angle to the ground (even if it strangely benefits my knees)?
I'm pretty sure it's not strictly a matter of personal choice. I'm not sure this is a habit worth breaking, but I loathe that I can't trace all my seeming "choices" back to root causes of some sort.
Today the Wilderness Office Park is much less icy, but still not safe for shoes of any heel or slippyness. So I wore my light sneakery shoes and carried in a pair of heels. I tried to wear casual shoes yesterday (it is casual dress week, after all) and felt awkward and unprofessional all day.
So today I'm wearing heels and jeans, which is about as casual as I'm okay with for work.
How did I come to think that sneakers weren't work shoes (even for jeans days)? How did I come to not feel fully dressed without my feet at an odd angle to the ground (even if it strangely benefits my knees)?
I'm pretty sure it's not strictly a matter of personal choice. I'm not sure this is a habit worth breaking, but I loathe that I can't trace all my seeming "choices" back to root causes of some sort.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 04:50 pm (UTC)Because it's funny to watch gender norms clash when you're that tall. You're supposed to wear heels, but you're not supposed to be taller than random guys you meet, so...
I gave up the heels a long time ago. My "professional" shoes are clunky flats of one sort or another (currently these, more or less), chiefly distinguished by how they don't hurt my women's-size-11 feet.
And anybody who has a problem with my footwear? Can so bite me.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 05:02 pm (UTC)I know, we're supposed to be talking about socialization and norms and all that. But (e-speaking as a woman who wears Doc Martens to the office because I like footwear I can walk in) I think those flats are most excellent! (And certainly *one* of the reasons women wear varied and oft-impractical shoes is aesthetics, shared with other women...)
aesthetics...
Date: 2004-12-21 06:05 pm (UTC)The part that's pure aesthetics and community-identification isn't a bad thing; it's just the other parts that are eeky.
Re: aesthetics...
Date: 2004-12-21 06:07 pm (UTC)Re: aesthetics...
Date: 2004-12-21 06:35 pm (UTC)Sexism isn't always something men do to women. Sometimes it's the expectations women hold of themselves and each other. Not that I have to tell anybody here that, of course.
Re: aesthetics...
Date: 2004-12-21 06:42 pm (UTC)It doesn't have to be that; the shared-aesthetics thing doesn't have to constrict.
Re: aesthetics...
Date: 2004-12-21 06:48 pm (UTC)Not that (being childfree) I'm any stranger to being excluded from groups of women. But this has IME been one more thing that has set me apart, sometimes when I didn't really want to be. Even when nobody would ever have suggested that I go out and buy fashionable shoes, or get myself knocked up.
Re: aesthetics...
Date: 2004-12-21 06:57 pm (UTC)What really stops me is the "angle to the ground" issue. I don't see how I can ever accept an aesthetic that causes me to be more vulnerable and possibly mis-shape my own feet. (My grandmother's feet were ultimately bent permanently into high-heel shape and could never wear flat shoes again. This makes me slightly biased, having seen this firsthand.)
Re: aesthetics...
Date: 2004-12-21 07:07 pm (UTC)Still. It bothers me to think that I'm contributing to an ideal that damages people's feet, even if I'm not personally injured by it. I'm not sure what I'm prepared to do about it, though.
Re: aesthetics...
Date: 2004-12-21 07:19 pm (UTC)Re: aesthetics...
Date: 2004-12-21 07:29 pm (UTC)Re: aesthetics...
Date: 2004-12-21 07:47 pm (UTC)And ditto what you said on the sexism front.
Though I will on principle argue the statement that walking at an angle is unnatural - done barefoot, it's actually pretty fast to run on your toes.
Re: running on your toes
Date: 2004-12-21 08:36 pm (UTC)It interests me that you find wearing heels more comfortable for your knees -- they tend to make one arch the back more, which I personally find uncomfortable for my lower back, but I never pondered the effect on the knees.
Re: running on your toes
Date: 2004-12-21 08:52 pm (UTC)The knee thing is that a solid, platformy heel gave me foot support while engaging my knees, so it built my tendons and muscles back up after a major dislocation. The platform sole, combined with ages of dancery training, also tends to push your weight evenly on your feet, so less back arch. I find it more comfortable for short bursts of walking, but hellacious for standing still.
Re: running on your toes
Date: 2004-12-21 08:55 pm (UTC)Re: aesthetics...
Date: 2004-12-21 07:47 pm (UTC)Re: aesthetics...
Date: 2004-12-21 09:29 pm (UTC)</ childfree rant>
(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 06:02 pm (UTC)The tall thing for women is a very interesting standard. Models are tall and wear heels. But while that may be presented as an ideal... not so much if you dwarf a man, huh?
Speaking of height, part of my thing may have been going from a tall middle schooler to a short adult (I'm 5'1"); going from having a certain height and sense of bigness to everyone else being bigger was pretty weird.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 06:39 pm (UTC)I do have opinions about attractiveness in shoes. Very dated ones, I fear; I haven't seen a genuinely attractive women's dress shoe in shoe-store windows for years, seems like, and a lot of stuff that I see (dress shoes and other shoes) is just, yuck. So whatever's driving my shoe aesthetic, it ain't fashion.
And shoe aesthetics lost out an awfully long time ago to blister, corn, and bunion avoidance. Life as a size 11. And yes, I hate shoe shopping with a wild passion. :)
Come to think of it, anyone who disapproves of my choice of footwear can -- come shoe-shopping with me, see just how bad it really is!
(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 06:48 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 06:52 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 09:34 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 09:41 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 06:50 pm (UTC)I can guess how crappy shoe shopping would be for you just by the sizes in most stores - clearly, a 10 is considered the absolute max by someone in the shoe design & sales chain. It's roughly the equivalent of me trying to find a pair of well-fitted pants, except badly fitted pants won't actually injure me.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 09:28 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 07:23 pm (UTC)Personally, I feel more comfortable in jeans and sneakers. At least I can deal with people being assholes to me in my own clothes.
And I like you too...which is why I'm glad you friended me also :)
(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 07:54 pm (UTC)It's interesting you mentioned the "your own clothes" distinction, because I tend to think of one set of clothes as a work costume and the other as a play costume - but neither one as my "natural state" or whatever. Hmmm.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 09:26 pm (UTC)Hmmm. Would you say that you're a comfortable nudist? I tried that lifestyle for a short while and wasn't comfortable with myself being nude although I didn't care if others were. I guess that's why I feel so close to my clothes. I'm just not comfortable with my own nudity.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 09:59 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-21 10:09 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-12-22 02:23 am (UTC)I find the more time I spend wearing relatively little clothing - and with other underdressed/naked friends - the better I feel about my body. It is one of my favorite parts about having grown up in a predominantly female household.